Tuesday, October 20, 2009

Vacation: A comparison

It's a totally normal thing to ask--"how was your vacation!?" with excitement in the voice. I hate to let people down when they ask, but to be honest? Our trip to far eastern Canada was... Hard. Challenging. Exhausting. Mixed in with a bit of family fun.

The truth of the matter is, travelling with a toddler is DAMN hard work. It's supposed to be fun and there are definitely moments when it is. But for the parents, taking the toddler out of the home, the routine, the child-proofed house and flying him 9 hours to the WAY eastern shores of Canada is... well, tough. For everyone involved (including cabin crew, fellow passengers, parents).

Were it not for the beautiful kindness of strangers, I would not have survived the return trip alone. That's right, ALONE. For various annoying reasons, M was not able to get on my flight back from Halifax, so I flew 9 hours (plus transfers) with E alone. M's been telling me his buddies at work told him I should "buck up." Um, F-you. You do not know my kid. He's the kid no one wants to travel with (serves me right for hating travelling with other people's kids all those years). He's loud, he kicks your chair, he wants to touch everything and he doesn't give a fig about TV or other forms of entertainment (except maybe in short 2 minute intervals). So 9 hours alone in a tight, confined, shared space with 150 individuals was TOUGH. We're talking constantly walking the cabin, vertical diaper changes in that tiny-ass lav and LOTS of carrying. (My back still hasn't fully recovered and occasionally spasms)

Then, landing at SFO and having to load up the Bob (stroller), carseat, my GIANT 60 lbs bag, my carry on and another unwieldy bag and drag it on AirBart and to my car and then INSTALL the damn car seat (first time) was the final straw. It nearly brought me to tears. I *almost* called our good friends to have her husband come help me install the seat.

Anyways, our vacation to Canada isnt the sort of trip I'd classify as a vacation. There were no lingering dinners over lovely and amazing food. There were no unplanned stops at wineries. There were no spa appointments or leisurely enjoying a book on the beach. I've come to realize those vacations no longer exist for me (so long as we take E with us).

We take different vacations now. The kind where I walk into our beach cottage and evaluate the risks of each sharp corner, table, brick and glass and try to mitigate potential damages by child-proofing. Barricading doors, fireplaces and dangly glass objects from the curious reach of E. Our daily activities revolve around whether E could tolerate the planned activity for any length of time. (will he jump out of the paddleboat? Would he sit in the stroller long enough to enjoy a nature walk? will he destroy the restaurant?) And meals are now eaten in shifts with one parent typically enjoying a glass of wine and apps alone while the other walks/entertains E in hopes we can all sit down for 10 minutes to enjoy an entree together.

To be honest, M is not to bothered by this. He's not a sit-around-read-a-book kinda guy. When we'd do our thrice-annual trips to Maui, he'd surf, beach comb, do anything but sit and layout with a book. So he's loving have a new little buddy to take along. And I say, more power to ya!!

Thank god I have an amazing dad for a husband. As much as it wasn't relaxing, it was such a joy to see E experience feeding bunny rabbits for the first time, walk the Nova Scotia beaches with Daddy, pick up rocks and point gleefully at the birds, go paddleboating and visit all his family in Timberlea.

As much as I miss the vacations of yesteryear, I am thrilled to experience a new kind of vacation.

Now I just need another one.

Vamos a Mexico! See ya next week!