Who can you trust?

Today I recieved even more annoying news (of the same kind I recieved about 3 weeks ago). A good friend, S, emailed me because a mutual friend of ours (N) emailed her to find out if I had my baby yet. (Why N didnt ask me herself is an unknown). N's mother is an old friend of my mother's, so I know where she got this misinformation. I certainly didn't tell her. Very few people knew I was pregnant, and S wasn't one of them.

This is the second, and most infuriating, time this has happened. When I was pregnant and we decided to tell our parents a few weeks earlier than we wanted to, the main reason for that was to give my mother some much-deserved good news (other bad family stuff happening on her side of the family, which is why we are going to Japan). We made them PROMISE not to tell anyone until I cleared the first trimester. They promised.

M's mother cracked, she told her sister (who undoubtedly told the other 3 siblings, their kids, and M's grandmother). But when I miscarried and we confronted her, she admitted that she told someone. So we knew what to expect.

When I miscarried and both of my parents knew, only my father told me that he "accidentally" told his brother that I miscarried (and not before). I was annoyed, but ok with that because I KNEW. In light of this most recent email, I now know of at least 2 other people my mother told, who obviously told their own daughters, who emailed S, who emailed me. One of the other daughters called me about a month ago asking when I had my baby (apparently my mother told them I was due in October??)

Needless to say I AM PISSED OFF. VERY VERY PISSED OFF.

S was very kind and sad and upset that she had upset me. She also tried to calm me and remind me of how excited everyone must have been to share the good news, before I rip into my mother. But regardless, my mom is going to hear about this. It was never her good news to share, in my opinion, it was ours. It was ours to decide WHO to tell and WHEN. And when we were kind enough to share OUR news with them, it was not so that they could tell whoever, especially after we specifically asked them not to tell anyone for a period of time. I dont care how excited anyone was, we said "do not tell anyone." And it was for a reason.

If you can't trust your parents to obey your wishes, especially with something so damn personal, then who can you trust?

*update: i confronted my mother on this issue in Japan. She *claims* not to have leaked the information. I want to believe her, she was adamant, but there is simply no way these people could have found out if not from her.