Friday, May 29, 2009

New life, new rules

I've been made aware, forcefully in some respects, that my new life does (and must) encompass a new set of rules. This wasn't something I was completely prepared for, but over time I've adjusted to it. I thought I was adjusting well. For example, I've become quite the planner now (if it's possible to plan more than I did before)--always having to think 10 steps ahead and anticipate every possible need/roadblock/want for E. I've acquired new skills and even more importantly, new friends. My new friends (who are also moms) have become my lifeline. We support each other, understand what life is like at this stage and hold realistic expectations of each other as we grow into our new roles.

The flip side of that is that I have lost friends too. It's unfortunate, but I understand that that too was a necessary evil. Learning and adapting to my new role in life is tough, but doing so while managing our home & lives, maintaining and thriving in my job and progressing on our goals has proven to be extremely overwhelming. Unfortunately that has meant that I'm more forgetful, I'm constantly moving at the speed of light (my husband calls me "the tornado" now) and unfortunately, I can't be present in quite the same capacity in other areas of my former life. I am constantly struggling with the feeling that my plate is too full, I can't handle it all.

I've posted about this before, but I feel an urgent need to significantly simplify my life in order to manage what I do have going on successfully. And like many other moms, struggle, almost daily, with a proper balance between work, life, love, friends and children.

There's no real point here... I guess the take-home lesson has been, "win some, lose some." Too bad it can't be all winning....

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