Saturday, August 18, 2007

Life really does go on

Every time I hear that phrase,"life goes on," I can't help but think of the old show from the 80's (and BT who was incessantly told she looked like Rebecca from that show, because she did!) and the theme song from the show. Good times.

As of late, I've been thinking about it more though. It's really wierd how quickly life does go on when something like this happens. And it's truly amazing how resilient we, as people in general, really are. It's also really wierd how easy and fast we can resume our normal lives after experiencing such a terrible loss. In fact, M and I have been told more than a few times by our wonderful friends and even our family that they are impressed with how we have handled this. But when I think about it, what other choice do we have? I mean, I guess we could have crawled into the proverbial hole and waited for the light of day (or another pregnancy) to bless us and make us feel better. But we aren't like that so we have no choice but to pick ourselves up, try to remind ourselves that we were lucky enough to conceive at all, be with people who make us laugh and think good thoughts about the future when I can (fingers crossed) get pregnant again.

The hardest things, at this point, are the constant reminders. As you would imagine, we see a lot more pregnant women (is *everyone* preggers right now or what?!), crazy numbers of people pushing strollers and moms lunching (ok, we were in Burlingame on a Thursday morning, but still). And those times are the ones that sting right now. I'm kinda hoping it'll be like a broken bone, eventually the bone will set, and any future pain will really be ghost pains. Reminders of what used to be broken but has since healed and is completely functional again. I haven't lost a parent or grandparent or even a loved one before, so I don't know what it feels like. But I imagine that it is similar in that after the inital shock and grief, the reminders feel like little earthquakes. You never know when one is going to strike, but it does, it sucks, and all you can do is try to keep moving forward.

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